Metro St. Louis
Seniors Golf
Association
For the purpose of golf
and good fellowship
Golf Diplomacy?
from Rett Murch of the News Press


Golf diplomacy, for reminders of the rules and etiquette of golf.


  1.     Has the doctor advised you not to pick up heavy objects like
flag sticks? I notice you haven’t picked one up all day.

2.     I appreciate your taking so long to putt. I usually take a nap
 this time of day anyway and this fits right in.

3.     Good of you to avoid the cart paths. I’ll bet they are getting
worn down from all the traffic.

4.     I notice you leave your ball marks on the green as a reminder of
your visit. Have you thought of placing your business card in them so that
you get proper credit.

5.     Thats an impressive divot you just made. I can see why you didn't
want to replace it. That would cover it up and no one would know. The next
golfer whose ball ends up there will certainly appreciate how deep it is.

6.     Clever of you to tee off in front of the tee markers. The tee is
getting pretty worn down by all the people hitting from the same spot.

7.     Sorry I missed your last joke. I was putting at the same time and
only caught snatches of it as I jerked my birdie attempt off line.

8.     I'm glad you're keeping score. I thought you had a 6 there but I
see you actually had a 5. Silly of me.

9.     Those 16 clubs in your bag must be getting a little heavy. That
must be why everyone else carries 14.

10.     Did you stumble in the hazard while you were looking for your ball?
It looked like you accidentally kicked it 4 feet into that opening to the
green. Are you OK?


The very best from Rett Murch of the News Press.

I followed a foursome playing very slow,  They were three holes behind. Later
at the 19th hole, I said to them.  I'm going to report that foursome in front
of you for playing too fast. They must of gotten four holes ahead of you. No
way could you catch up with them.